Ersatz Europe

I just read a posting by my friend, Aaron. He and his girlfriend recently moved to Kannapolis, NC (which sounds somewhat faux Greco, but that's not where we're going today...) It seems that Aaron endured a rather grueling (note the cheeky reference to yesterday's post) experience in the dreaded Newark airport. Following said experience, however, he has arrived in Montreal. One can only imagine the rush of overwhelming relief he must have felt upon arrival...

Aaron's blog, btw, is well worth reading. You can check it out at http://www.butdonttrytotouchme.blogspot.com/

Never having been to Montreal (or any part of Canada) I am forced to rely on the rhapsodic praise I have heard re the city from several friends who have visited it. From what I have gathered, it is a very Francofied (sp?) city, with everything from language to architecture mirroring La Belle France (which I have visited several times and love!) I have no doubt that Aaron and Laurie will have a delightful time in such a place.

Now...given my admitted anglophilia, I have started to ponder the case for an American London. Rule, Britannia! (Yes, I just stood, faced Oxford, and sang the first two lines of the song... "Rule, Britannia! Britannia rules the waves!") Okay, maybe I'm lying about that...or maybe not...

Anyway, if Crazy Larry can push to have Birmingham host the Olympics in 2020, perhaps I could get him on board for "West London, Alabama." To wit, my ideas...

. Annex one of the outlying areas just beyond the Bham city limits...preferably someplace with very little development. West London needs to be built from scratch, both literally and figuratively.

.With the exception of "Little Ben," "West Westminster Abbey," and a Harrod's satellite store, any attempts to recreate actual London landmarks should probably be avoided. This is a refuge and an homage, not a theme park. The architecture and overall essence of The City is what we seek to replicate.

.Strong financial incentive should be offered to hire as many British expats as possible to work in the community. Hearing the dulcet tones of The Motherland will be part of the experience.

.West London would be the obvious locale for Alabama's arts and cultural center (The Western West End?) With all due (not much) respect to the City of Montgomery, the ASF should be relocated. Toss in a couple of first-rate local performing arts groups and a healthy touring schedule, and we're set. A lovely museum along the lines of the V&A would be nice...not sure what Larry's wife is named, but we could easily call it the "L& (whatever her first initial may be.)

. Pubs. Lots of them. This is not to say that West London will be some sort of lawless college-bar metrop. On the contrary, civilized drinking and social interaction will be the order of the day. The requisite brass and red-curtained "look" will be in place, as will the more civilized Euro-views on alcohol consumption. (Hand to God, the only drunks I have ever seen in the UK have been Americans... those of The Motherland are raised with fewer taboos, and therefore far fewer instances of gross overindulgence.)

.Fish and Chips stalls and Kebab vans. Enough said.

. While American Law will certainly still prevail, West London judges will wear powdered wigs in the style of their British counterparts. Attorneys will, of course, be called "barristers," while paralegals will be "solicitors." (The comparison isn't exact, but close enough...)

.British holidays will be observed, including Boxing Day and 5 November ("Remember, remember the 5th of November, gunpowder, treason, and plot...") 4 July will be a bit awkward, but good will and civility will certainly prevail.

...and the list goes on. This idea has about as much chance of ever happening as the 2020 Olympics in Birmingham, but Crazy Larry has taught us Birminghamians to think big. If nothing else, it's been a fun way to start the morning...

In other news, Lovey and I both auditioned for the commercial/tv show/whatsit yesterday, along with Thurston IV. I enjoyed the audition, but there was something decidedly sketchy about it. Nobody in authority seemed able to explain exactly WHAT the show was/is. All we gathered was...

. It has something to do with the environment.

. There are significant corporate sponsors (Coca-Cola and Nike were mentioned.)

. There is a large green bus that travels the country promoting "green" activity.

...and that's about it. The people in charge were extremely nice, very welcoming, and seemingly sincere. They just seemed unable (or unwilling) to tell us if this was an audition for a tv show, a live performance, or something in between. Oh well, we'll see if we hear back from them...

In today's News From The Motherland... The RSC and Sci-Fi fans collide...
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/7523210.stm

Obama in '08!!!

FLT3